Monday, July 6, 2026

The Day of Infamy Space Pearl Harbor #rabtbooktours




Thriller, Alternative History, Science Fiction, Space Exploration, Espionage, Crime

Date Published: April 30, 2026



In The Day of Infamy - Space Pearl Harbor, a covert Iranian plot threatens to ignite a new era of warfare - not on Earth, but in the heavens. When NASA contractor and double agent David Koestler stumbles upon a seemingly innocuous satellite deal with the fledgling Republic of Tsikistan, he unwittingly uncovers a chilling conspiracy: a disguised orbital weapon designed to annihilate the International Space Station in a catastrophic collision, disguised as a debris accident. As Koestler navigates a labyrinth of espionage, political intrigue, and personal demons - from Huntsville's backroom dealings to Mossad's shadowy operations - time runs out to stop an attack that could cripple global space infrastructure and trigger a devastating conflict. With alliances shifting and traitors lurking at every turn, Koestler must outmaneuver enemies both foreign and domestic before the skies themselves become a battlefield. A gripping techno-thriller blending cutting-edge science, high-stakes espionage, and the specter of a new kind of war, one fought beyond the atmosphere.

 

About the Author

 


 Stewart Nozette was sentenced to Federal prison for conspiracy to violate the Espionage Act after he was stung in an undercover operation by an FBI agent posing as an agent for Israel's Mossad. Nozette, an MIT Ph.D. and former White House National Space Council, Departments of Energy, Defense, and NASA scientist, was housed in The Communications Management Unit dubbed "The Guantanamo Bay of the North," with spy Aldrich Ames, Islamic Terrorists and Pirates, including Muse, the star of "Captain Phillips," American Taliban John Walker Lindh, the 1993 World Trade Center Bombers, and the killers of Rabbi Meyer Kahane. Nozette invented the revolutionary Clementine mission, deriving from the Strategic Défense Initiative (SDI), housed in the National Air and Space Museum - the first US lunar return since Apollo; the mission discovered ice on the moon and led to the space race of the twenty-first century. 

 

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Master of the Hunt Teaser #rabtbooktours




Dark Fantasy Romance, Mystery & Suspense

Date Published: July 10, 2026



A werewolf prince and a lovely fairy police chief battle mad gods for the fate of a kingdom.

 

Sidhe Prince Dearg Galatyn is a werewolf, spymaster, and Blade of the Dragon God. When his deity sends him visions of a beautiful cop’s horrific murder, Dearg must save her at all costs. Otherwise, she won’t be the only one to die -- and his kingdom could be lost.

Iona Anann is the granddaughter of Maeve, the Mother of Fairies. Her day job is police chief of Summerwood, a quirky town full of magical creatures who make fantasy films. When the dragon god’s feared werewolf weapon shares his horrific visions, she is forced to accept Dearg as her bodyguard.

Then murder comes to Summerwood as the assassin begins picking off victims -- with Iona and her prince as his ultimate targets.

Locked in a pressure cooker of blood, magic and madness, Iona and Dearg begin to fall in love. But stalked by killers and psychotic gods, will they even live out the week?

 

Warning: Adult situations, graphic violence and language. No cheating, guaranteed HEA.

 


EXCERPT

 

My second cousin was plotting treason again.

I strode toward the private library in my parents’ wing, my boots clicking over the jeweled tiles. I needed to brief Dad on Goran Galatyn’s plot. We had to quell the bastard’s little rebellion before he dragged us all into another civil war.

My hand slid to the messenger pouch that held the evidence of Goran’s guilt. For the past month, I’d had my spies working to discover the extent of the treason -- the allies Goran had assembled, the knights, mercenaries, and armsmen he’d recruited or hired. My agents were well-placed and reliable -- a high-ranking knight, a noblewoman, one of my cousin’s so-called friends, and Goran’s mistress, all of whom had reason to hate the bastard. The evidence they’d collected was solid, corroborating each other even though none of them knew about the others. I’d compiled the reports and documents they’d produced into a coherent picture that revealed just how close Goran was to launching an attack.

Fortunately, the plot had yet to pick up steam. My father was a popular king, generous and fair, and his Morven subjects weren’t interested in swapping him for a predatory tyrant. Not after my uncle’s hellish reign.

With Dad’s approval, I’d head for my cousin’s mansion in the morning and… remind him why betraying King Llŷr Galatyn was a bad idea. Goran, you cretin, Dad gave you one second chance already. That’s all you g --

The vision hit between one step and the next, driving into me like a tournament lance. My knees buckled. I tripped, my face smacking the marble with a painful pop of light. The world dropped away.

Huge, brilliant eyes stared into mine, irises somewhere between green and gold, hot and lazy with passion. One corner of the woman’s lush mouth crooked up as she smiled. Her hair was long, a gleaming mass of green curls that tumbled around pale, bare shoulders. Her graceful fingers slid through my hair, her touch both sensual and soothing. “I love you,” she breathed, her voice throaty, rich with need. “I need you. Now.”

My c*ck hardened in a rush. No surprise, given the feel of her lean, athletic body, the sweet curves of her small breasts. But what did surprise me was the peace I felt -- as if I’d found the love my parents had. This is a hell of a lot better than my usual vis --

I should have known better.

The vision shattered into a thousand fragments amid breathless howls of pain. The accompanying image was worse. Huge talons gripped the woman I’d just been making love to, digging in as the creature crushed and twisted her like a scullery wringing a rag. Bones crunched and her green eyes bulged, screams breaking off into a breathless wheeze of terror and anguish. An immense raptor beak punched into her belly…

No! My horror snapped like thin ice over hot rage. I roared, trying to draw the jeweled sword at my hip, but my body lay paralyzed.

The vision tore, the pieces flying away like shreds of parchment in a hurricane.

My vision version gripped the curve of the woman’s ass as I pressed her against the wall. “I swear they won’t get you as long as I --”

Shreds flew, and she was dressed like an American cop in a black uniform, a gold badge gleaming on her chest. She stood crouched and ready with a longsword in her hands in front of a shop window. The English words Summerwood Spells and Potions flowed in gold script across the expanse of plate glass. Lovely face cold with fury, she stepped forward, swinging the sword with impressive strength --

Another blade rammed straight through her chest. Her unseen attacker lifted her off her feet and kicked her body off his sword, sending her flying backward to slam into the window. It shattered, and she fell into the display beyond, landing amid tumbling bottles that broke under her weight.

Sickened, I stared through the glass shards as she writhed in pain, gasping, the light draining from her huge green eyes as pumping blood soaked the window display --

The scene broke apart again, and she pressed silken and strong against vision-me as I suckled her pretty bare breasts --

I watched her die again.

The tortuous visions went on and on, me making love to her, then witnessing her murder, each death more twisted and violent than the last -- eaten by monsters, screaming in agony as she burned like a torch, crushed under a hurtling boulder, thrown by unseen hands over the edge of a cliff, hacked apart with a massive axe. Nightmare piled on nightmare until I prayed for her torture to end.

I was no stranger to watching people die -- I’d killed my share. But watching the cop die again and again drove sick, helpless despair through me. In between those hideous deaths, she stared into my eyes with a love I’d thought I’d never find. Women bedded me for the power and bragging rights that came with fucking a prince, but they didn’t love me. I was the King’s dog, not quite Sidhe enough despite my royal blood.

To everyone, it seemed, but her.

The vision tore for the last time, and I found myself lying on cold tiles staring at a marble column, my head aching so hard, my eyes throbbed.

“What. The fuck. Was that?” The words emerged as a rumbling growl. I pushed myself to hands and knees that were as huge and furry as the rest of my body, fingers tipped in three-inch claws. My werewolf form. When did I shift?

Didn’t matter. I had to find her, protect her, whoever she was. Right the hell now.

Yes, Cachamwri’s voice rumbled from the depths of my mind, the Dragon God’s magic vibrating in my bones. Without her, we’re all lost. Find her in Summerwood and let nothing separate you until she’s safe. Show no mercy to any who would feed upon her.

Over the fifteen years since Cachamwri had demanded my service, I’d never craved a mission. I craved this one. I had to save her. I couldn’t let her die, let her suffer, let the assassins torture her. I’d have gone after her even without your orders.

I know. That’s why you’re my Blade. The god sounded smug.

But Cachamwri wasn’t the only one I owed a duty to. I’ve got to tell Dad I’m going. I can’t let him get blindsided by this… whatever the hell it is.

Yes, tell him. But be quick. Without you, she’ll die tonight.

I struggled to my feet, as clumsy and aching as if I’d been beaten with a bag of bricks. Grimly, I headed down the corridor, the pain falling away as Cachamwri’s strength flooded me, washing away the ache and confusion.

Bones crunched and her green eyes bulged. Screams breaking off into a breathless wheeze of terror and anguish. An immense raptor beak punched into her belly --

The hall spun, and I stumbled against the wall, swallowing bile. I’d be experiencing flashbacks until I fulfilled my assignment. Goran Galatyn’s rebellion would have to wait.

Your father will have no kingdom to save if she dies, the dragon god told me.

I didn’t doubt Cachamwri. Whoever was behind this was a monster, and I wanted him dead as badly as my god did. I’d never met the green-haired woman, but I knew her. Her taste, her smile, her passion. I wanted to know even more. Ached to know everything.

Some sane part of me rebelled. This isn’t me. I didn’t do love at first sight -- not after getting kicked in the teeth by court ladies so often. Especially not because of a vision, for Cachamwri’s sake. I wasn’t that kind of impulsive idiot.

But this clawing need said otherwise. I couldn’t let the fuckers kill her.

You have thirty minutes. No longer. Cachamwri’s thundering presence faded to a distant mental rumble. I sighed in relief as the crushing pressure lifted. Reaching for my magic, I shifted back to Sidhe form, the blue brocade and silk of my court garb returning, jeweled sword swinging in its scabbard by my left hip.

Something stung my leg like a hive of bees, the pain so sharp, I jerked and swore. An abrupt, grinding hunger rolled over me -- not for food, but the blood of the woman’s would-be assassins.

 


About the Author

New York Times best-selling author Angela Knight has written and published more than sixty novels, novellas, and ebooks, including the Mageverse and Merlin’s Legacy series. With a career spanning more than two decades, Romantic Times Bookclub Magazine has awarded her their Career Achievement award in Paranormal Romance, as well as two Reviewers’ Choice awards for Best Erotic Romance and Best Werewolf Romance.

Angela is currently a writer, editor, and cover artist for Changeling Press LLC. She also teaches online writing courses. Besides her fiction work, Angela’s writing career includes a decade as an award-winning South Carolina newspaper reporter. She lives in South Carolina with her husband, Michael, a thirty-year police veteran and detective with a local police department.


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Publisher on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok: @changelingpress

 

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Saturday, July 4, 2026

The Terrible Old Woman's Fourth of July Video 2026

 

Wanna know what's coming up for you in July? You can trust this face! I pull the cards from the sinister Cthulhu's Vault deck. See the video description to buy your own if you are so inclined.

Friday, July 3, 2026

His Sacrifice Week Blast #rabtbooktours




Secret Society Romance

Date Published: 01-22-2026

Publisher: Evernight Publishing



In a city ruled by a secretive Coalition, the gap between rich and poor is evident. When the leader dies, a fierce competition arises. James Roarke believes he’s destined to lead. To secure his place, he chooses Kleya Dane as his wife, drawn to her kindness for all, regardless of wealth.

Together, they form an unbreakable bond, but power comes at a price. As the competition intensifies, James learns that to claim leadership, he must make an unimaginable sacrifice: Kleya's life. Can love survive when ambition demands the ultimate cost?

 

About the Author

 

 I’m passionate about weaving tales of romance and connection, inviting readers into worlds where love conquers all. Crafting heartfelt stories and steamy scenes that make the pulse race, as well as taking readers on swoon-worthy adventures. I try to weave emotions into my stories that punch you in the gut because I love stories that break your heart before putting it back together. I try to write characters who aren't cookie cutters and push myself to write complicated situations that I have no idea how to resolve, forcing me to think outside the box. I strive to create characters who are complex and full of flaws. Deep passion romance between heroes and heroines who find redemption through love.

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Thursday, July 2, 2026

Insecure Writers Support Group July 2026 Meets Full Throttle Day One

 


Image by Emslichter from Pixabay

 July 1 question - Is there anything you'd like to see changed, added, and/or rearranged about the book publishing industry? 

 Yes. I would like for there to be continued easier access for independent authors to publish and sell their own works. 

Today, however, I'm here to talk about a course I'm taking through AutoCrit to perhaps help me start being able to finish things again.

The course is called Full Throttle. It's a 30-day immersive drafting course.

The following is my answer to today's check-in question.

 I already knew I was a plantser, but I took the quiz anyway.


I’ve opted to do a fairytale retelling to hopefully get myself back into regularly finishing projects. I write prolifically, but I rarely finish any of my fiction projects at this point. I have realized that the way I was writing before was akin to John Bradshaw’s “Body By Bondo” analogy. Bondo is a substance used in auto bodywork. Amateur auto enthusiasts without a lot of resources at their disposal use it to make repairs and cross their fingers that it holds. Consequently, that’s how I was managing every area of my life. My entire existence in this life, perhaps most especially my psychological state, is a Body By Bondo project.


Rather than seeing this as an endeavor that I will of course fail because I suck at everything, I’m trying to see it as a way to learn skills that will hopefully make not only my writing life but my life in general more manageable. Making impossible demands of myself and then beating myself up for failing to meet these demands is not working anymore, not that it ever really worked. I was just younger and able to beat myself up harder without immediate consequences in the past.

 Ornery Owl Has Spoken


 

 Free Use Image from Open Clipart Vectors

 

https://www.insecurewriterssupportgroup.com/p/iwsg-sign-up.html

 If you'd like to learn more about AutoCrit, follow this link.

 https://bit.ly/SelfEditEasier

If you would actually like to buy Bondo, you can check it out here. 

https://amzn.to/4va1GIS 

If you'd like to buy John Bradshaw's book Healing the Shame That Binds You, click here.

https://amzn.to/4p4KcfB

I will earn a small commission for any purchases made through the above links. 

 

Burned Out Book Blitz #rabtbooktours


Non-Fiction, Self-help

Date Published: May 29, 2026

Publisher: Manhattan Book Group 


       


Burned Out evolved from conversations I had with a friend who had been a firefighter for 30 years. He shared stories about traumas he and his fellow firefighters experienced while on the job. We discussed universal challenges that first responders face in terms of not knowing what to do with this trauma, recognizing its symptoms,  and the impact it had on family members and loved ones. I interviewed male and female paramedics, firefighters, and Emergency Medical Technicians (EMT's) around the country to get their candid personal stories and experiences.  I also interviewed family members. We all shared the goal of wanting to. help fellow first responders and family members understand the dynamics of trauma, its impact, and how they can get support to cope with its consequences with renewed understanding and resilience.
 

Key themes of book:
  1. What types of trauma do first responders experience on the job?

  2. How does it impact them physically and emotionally?

  3. How does it affect their relationships with family members and loved ones?

  4. How can first responders and family members understand and  cope with these traumas?

  5. What ways can they effectively communicate and understand the ramifications of trauma?

  6. Where can they go for help to deal with the trauma and learn to heal from it?

 
Message for readers: My hope for those who read this book is that you will have a greater understanding and appreciation for the sacrifices our first responders and their families make in the service of others. I believe reading these personal accounts in combination with the information, support, and resources provided will be invaluable to all who take the time to read Burned Out. I hope you will share it with others you believe might find it beneficial.


About the Author


Iris Waichler has been a well known patient advocate and licensed clinical social worker for the last 40 years. She began her career working with geriatric patients who experienced catastrophic illness and counseled them and their families about adapting to these medical problems. She helped them understand their medical condition helping them to cope with the disease and its impact on their lives.

She is an award winning author. In addition she is a prominent speaker presenting on topics related to infertility and caregiving. She has been featured in Redbook, Parade, MindBodygreen.com., Forbes Magazine and Next Avenue Magazine. She also has done many radio shows and podcasts.

Iris has taught and supervised social work students, medical students, interns, residents, and nurses about patient rights, ethics.

Ms. Waichler found herself in the role of a patient when she battled infertility for many years. The feelings of loss and helplessness she personally experienced were profound. She promised herself if she was successful in having a child she would do everything she could to help other people fighting infertility.


She authored a second award winning book, RIDING THE INFERTILITY ROLLER COASTER, A GUIDE TO EDUCATE AND INSPIRE. This book won 4 awards including 2 best book of the year awards. The response was so great she began doing individual and group counseling with people who had infertility. She volunteered for RESOLVE, a national infertility group, and went on to do a series of radio interviews, magazine articles, workshops, and speeches on infertility topics.

Her book, ROLE REVERSAL, HOW TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND YOUR AGING PARENTS, has won 8 major book awards. Her experience in caring for her beloved father, who died at age 97, triggered her passion in reaching out to others who suddenly find themselves in a caregiver role and are uncertain about what to do or where to go for help. In this book she shares her father’s inspiring story and her personal and professional experience in assuming the challenges that come with being a caregiver for an aging loved one.

Iris has been doing freelance writing for the last 18 years. The focus of her work has been on health related topics. She also does workshops and speeches offering caregiving tips for caregiver family members and educating healthcare professionals.

Ms. Waichler lives in Chicago with her husband, Steve, and her daughter, Grace and her mini golden doodle Brandi. She loves to travel whenever she can and to spend time with friends and family.

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Electric Boy Teaser #rabtbooktours




LGBTQ Romance, Romantic Comedy

Date Published: July 3, 2026



In ‘80s London, the fantastical Julian Collier is a charismatic punk rock band frontman. Everyone is drawn to him, including Rahul, his best friend and bandmate, who has loved him for years.

When a mysterious upper-class stranger suddenly inserts himself into their lives, it becomes clear Julian isn’t entirely straight, and the two men struggle for Julian’s affections. But the best man might not win this fight.

 



EXCERPT

 

Hoxton, London, UK

November 1987

The Barber & Pony was a poor excuse for a pub, as far as Rahul was concerned. The ancient booths held grime older than Rahul himself. The watery draught was just this side of unpleasantly warm. The air was so thick with smoke he could have cut it with a blunt butter knife and spread it on the pub’s stale pork scratchings. Even an oblivious bystander could have told you that Rahul Chaand detested The Barber & Pony; yet he had patronised the pub every single week since he had moved back to London three years ago. Sometimes more than once a week. Three, four times even. He came because of him.

He was at the bar tonight, as he was most nights, with his skinny elbows propped on the pockmarked mahogany, and head hanging between the sharp hillocks of his shoulders. Rahul came to The Barber & Pony because it was his boozer. Rahul would have followed him to the ends of the Earth, let alone a crummy pub in Hoxton. He knew it was pitiful. There was hardly anything about their relationship that didn’t paint Rahul in a distinctly desperate shade of pathetic. He’d come to terms with that long ago. It didn’t matter to him anymore. All that mattered to Rahul was that Julian Collier was upset. And he needed to be here for him, just as he always was.

“What’s this I hear about a row?” he said in a light, unthreatening tone as he slid onto the stool beside Julian.

“What’re you on about?” He was already slurring. That wasn’t a good sign.

Julian was, by nature, a sunshiny young man with few troubles to cloud his unburdened mind. He wasn’t a rich man. He wasn’t famous. He didn’t have a particularly successful relationship and his friend group was distressingly small. But he was beautiful, fashionable, and well loved. He was passionate about music, and the fact that he both sold records and played in a band did much to nourish his simple soul. But Rahul suspected the main reason that Julian was a happy person was because he was simply born that way. He came into the world with a sunny disposition that life and circumstance had often endeavoured to strip from him.

On occasion, however, a mood as heavy and dark as a storm cloud would settle upon his narrow shoulders, usually brought on by the emotional vampire he liked to call a girlfriend. Thankfully, these sulks tended to be mercifully short, and Rahul found himself to be adept at pulling his best friend out of them even quicker.

Having gotten word from Leroy about the positively massive row that Julian and his girlfriend had engaged in, Rahul had come as soon as he was able.

“He’ll cost me customers,” Leroy, the bartender, had told him after repeating some of the choice words that had been screamed. By the time Rahul had arrived, Aisling, the “girlfriend,” seemed to be long gone, though Julian remained at the bar, sullen and unmoveable as he sank deeper and deeper into his cups. Time for the ol’ Rahul-man to shine, eh? He fancied himself the Julian Whisperer. And it stood to reason. After all, no two people knew each other as well or as deeply as they.

“C’mon, small fry,” he began with the familiar nickname, one that was his alone to use. Julian, being of average height, was short to Rahul only, who at any given moment was the tallest man in the room. “I know you and Aisling have had it out again. What’s she think you’ve done this time? Ruined the economy? Started the Cold War?”

“Can’t do anything right, as far as she’s concerned,” he pouted self- indulgently.

“Tell me about it. It’s practically every other week she’s picking a fight. I’ll never understand why you put up with her and her nagging.”

“She’s not a nag, all right?” Julian contradicted. “She’s just got a point of view. She’s a modern woman.”

“All right, all right,” Rahul backed off, sensing they had not yet arrived at the well-worn territory of slagging off his girlfriend before they inevitably made up again. “A modern woman, sure. Do you want to talk about it? What happened? Maybe talk about it back at your flat?”

“I’m not going anywhere,” he continued to pout, planting himself more firmly at the bar just as Leroy passed both Rahul and Julian fresh glasses of beer. Rahul shot the bartender an incredulous look to which Leroy only shrugged helplessly and retreated.

Rahul sighed and tried again. “Fine. We’ll stay right here. As long as we talk. You’re good at talking, Julesy. That’s what draws people to you. The Talker Extraordinaire, that’s what they call you. Silver-tongued. Couldn’t shut you up if I tried.”

“Wouldn’t let you try. I’d be too busy talking.” A smile threatened to break free, like the sun peeking out behind clouds. “You’d try to get a word in edgewise and bam, there I’d be, gabbing away.”

“Gabby Gabber. Gabriel Gabber to your friends.”

Just as Julian seemed ready to add another rung in the ladder of nonsense, his smile disintegrated like a sandcastle in the surf and the dark mood retook him. “She hates it when I talk like this, you know? Says it’s stupid. Maybe she’s right. I really am quite stupid.” His long, pale fingers fumbled out a cigarette, and, failing to find a lighter, let it hang limply from his lips.

Rahul sipped at his beer to cover his profound disappointment. He’d been so close to lifting his friend out of this funk. His fight with Aisling must have cut him deeper than he’d realised. They fought frequently, breaking up every other week only to make up again, but the fights seemed to Rahul to always be superficial things -- who left the toilet seat up and who used whose hair spray -- and the rows were just as easy to overcome as a result. Rahul blamed Aisling, mainly. Julian was as amiable as a fluttering butterfly unless he was provoked.

“She never did,” Rahul exclaimed, aghast. “Did she really say that?” And, in a softer, more serious tone, “You’re not, you know. Stupid.”

“Must be. Else why would I keep making her mad?”

Rahul took pity on him and finally extricated his own lighter from his jacket pocket, lighting Julian’s cigarette for him.

“Because she’s horrendous,” Rahul answered the rhetorical question. “And nothing could ever make her happy. Even you. Now why don’t you tell me what really happened, eh?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know.”

“Sorry?” Rahul’s face scrunched in confusion, pausing with the glass halfway to his lips.

“S’your fault, innit?” Julian grumbled, pulling his own lukewarm pint closer. “Me and Ash falling out. She was right. It’s always your fault.”

Rahul knew he shouldn’t take it personally. These were the aftershocks of his row with Aisling. But he couldn’t help the curiosity that welled within him. “How is it my fault exactly?”

“Aisling and me’d be married already if it weren’t for you being all… third-wheel. Always getting in the way.”

The words hit him hard and sharp in the chest, threatening to puncture his heart. He doesn’t mean it, he tried to convince himself. He’s smashed. Aisling’s upset him. He’s just having a bit of a tantrum, that’s all. It was with great effort that Rahul trampled the well of emotion threatening to bubble over and plastered on a placid smile beneath his moustache.

“You don’t mean that.”

“Do too. I use up all the good part of me on you, and then I’ve got none left for her.”

“You’re talking nonsense, Jules. Obviously you’re upset. I can see that. Let’s just get you home and we’ll talk about it like adults.” He wrapped his fingers around Julian’s upper arm, but the shorter man shook him off, swaying dangerously on his stool as he did so. He turned eyes on Rahul that burned blue as an electrical fire.

“That’s just it. You’re always trying to control me. You think you’re so much better than me, don’t you? Just ‘cause you went to your fancy uni and I stayed back here. Just cause your dad owned shops and I never even had a dad.”

“How could you think that I…” Rahul trailed off, shocked into silence. He had never, since he’d met Julian as a child, thought himself better than him. They both came from nothing. It was one of the founding principles of their friendship. And they still had nothing. Nothing but each other. Julian knew this, consciously. This wasn’t him talking, it was the booze, and Rahul had to keep that in focus before he lost his temper.

“Look,” he began slowly, carefully metering out his words. “You’ve had a long day, yeah? I know I’m around a bit more than I ought to be sometimes, but that’s because I’m taking care of you. You know that. Mel knows that. She asks me to take care of you. I’m sorry that Aisling has a problem with it, but that can hardly be helped. Next time you see her, tell her I’m sorry. Now. Why don’t you come with me and we can forget all about it, yeah?”

He reached for Julian again but this time Julian’s hand struck first, finger extended into a sharp point that thrust into Rahul’s chest like a very entitled dart. He poked him. “No. No no no. You listen to me,” Julian slurred. His blue eyes that had once burned were now melted back into glassy puddles that couldn’t quite focus on Rahul. “You don’t come in here like a… a… a jumped-up ponce with an anaemic caterpillar on his lip and tell me what to do, yeah? I’ll leave when I wanna leave. And you don’t control me, like Ash says. I’m my own man. I do what I want.”

Rahul flinched from the poke as if he’d been pushed. Anger surged in him like an ungrounded electric current. He chugged the remainder of his pint to keep his ire from boiling over and slammed the empty glass down on the counter. The resentment from years of Julian taking their friendship for granted began to rise to the surface. It was with monumental effort -- a deeper tribute to his love for Julian than Julian would ever know -- that he reined that rage into a dull simmer, something that would burn but wouldn’t scald. But even the bravest of wounded animals still lash out.

“You do what you want, eh?” Rahul snapped. “Or you do what Aisling tells you?” It wasn’t fair, of course, but hurt people hurt people, or so they say.

“Least I have somebody who tells me what to do.”

Rahul’s chest tightened. Julian clearly wasn’t playing fair either.

“I’d rather be alone than shackled to that girlfriend of yours,” he ground out.

“Or you’re just jealous.”

“Or you’re just an entitled little twat that can’t tell when someone’s trying to help him.”

“Trying to help me? Some help. Who asked you?”

“No one. You know what? Absolutely no one.” Rahul threw up his hands and stood, his heart pounding in his ear. He and Julian hadn’t fought like this in… he could scarcely remember when. They hadn’t even fought like this back when they’d… Well. Back then. Pulse thundering, he donned his coat and took off for the cold, drizzly London streets, not stopping to check if Julian was following him.

He still felt himself choke with guilt, however, when he made it halfway down the street and realised his friend had stayed behind. He would be fine. Right? Surely he would be fine. He’d been drunker than this on his own and made it home all right. He’d be fine… Wouldn’t he?

No, it wasn’t Rahul’s problem. If Julian wouldn’t let him help, then there was nothing for it. He couldn’t help someone who refused to be helped. Until he begged Rahul’s forgiveness and of course Rahul buckled like a flaccid accordion. Like he always did. Because it was Julian. And he was Rahul. And that’s how they worked. Or didn’t.

 

 

About the Author

As a queer, nonbinary, person of color, Nicky Silber has made it their mission to bring diversity into all of their creative outlets. Born in New York, raised in Mexico, they studied fine art in San Francisco and have worked in the video game industry since 2012. They currently live in the wilds of North Carolina with their young son and too many pets. Their only two goals in life are to continue to tell queer love stories and, to a lesser extent, finally knit their own sweater.

 

Nicky’s Website

Nicky on Instagram

Nicky on Threads

Nicky on TikTok

 

Publisher on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok: @changelingpress

 

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